Gabe 2: Stage Fright

Hi, my name is Gabe, and I suffer from stage fright. Last night, I had to do a short power point presentation for my boy scout troop. The troop is made up of kids ages 12 to 17, putting me on the older side, so a lot of the younger kids look up to me. I had prepared pretty well, and I knew what I was talking about, but when it came time to present, I found myself speaking softly and stumbling over my sentences. Thankfully, I made it to the end without any huge mistakes, but I still felt awful afterwards.

It’s not like I’m a stranger to presenting. Over the summer, I work at a summer camp where presenting to groups of people is literally part of my job. I’m responsible for teaching nature lessons and leading informational hikes for kids and their parents. The kids are aged anywhere between 5 and 10, and the group sizes can vary from 3 or 4 to upwards of 15. The weird part is, in this setting, I never get anxious or jittery. I’ve been told to teach things I know nothing about with literally only a moment’s notice, and done so pretty well without freaking out or stuttering or anything.

During meals at camp, sometimes I even get up on the stage in the center of the dining hall and sing camp songs or put on skits for the entire camp (200 to 400 people usually), which has to be one of the most humiliating things I am capable of doing. And yet, every time, I do it without getting nervous or feeling embarrassed.

Even so, I can’t imagine doing those same things in any other setting. A while back, I had to play trumpet in an audition at school. I practiced it endlessly, and I had done it several times on my own with no mistakes. But as soon it was time for the audition, the stage fright kicked in. I got super nervous, my face flushed, my mouth suddenly felt really dry, and I ended up cracking half of the notes. I didn’t get the part.

In the first few shows of my first year in marching band, I was barely able to play a note. Each time, as soon as I stepped onto the field my uniform suddenly felt really heavy and constricting. Everything I had spent almost every day for the last few months working on just vanished from my mind. Extraordinarily, I was actually able to conquer the stage fright in my third or fourth performance. I got super hyped up and confident moments before we went on, and suddenly everything was fine. Fast forward a year, and I no longer get nervous in marching band. But only marching band. As soon as I have to give a speech in class or perform an audition, the stage fright comes back.

Why does my stage fright only affect me in certain scenarios? How can I stop it? I’d like to hear your thoughts.